fbpx
  • HOME
    • About Us
    • Collaborate
    • Featured
  • Moms & Dads
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Family Time
    • Work
      • Career
      • Business
      • Money
  • Fun With
    • Little Kids
    • Big Kids
    • Teenagers
  • Education
    • Local Schools
    • Tuition & Enrichment
    • Students
  • Lifestyle
    • Health & Beauty
    • Food
  • Travel
    • Travel With Kids
    • Travel For Work
    • Staycations
  • Workshops
  • Contact Us
Sunday, March 7, 2021
  • Login
Universal Scribbles
  • HOME
    • About Us
    • Collaborate
    • Featured
  • Moms & Dads
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Family Time
    • Work
      • Career
      • Business
      • Money
  • Fun With
    • Little Kids
    • Big Kids
    • Teenagers
  • Education
    • Local Schools
    • Tuition & Enrichment
    • Students
  • Lifestyle
    • Health & Beauty
    • Food
  • Travel
    • Travel With Kids
    • Travel For Work
    • Staycations
  • Workshops
  • Contact Us
No Result
View All Result
  • HOME
    • About Us
    • Collaborate
    • Featured
  • Moms & Dads
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Family Time
    • Work
      • Career
      • Business
      • Money
  • Fun With
    • Little Kids
    • Big Kids
    • Teenagers
  • Education
    • Local Schools
    • Tuition & Enrichment
    • Students
  • Lifestyle
    • Health & Beauty
    • Food
  • Travel
    • Travel With Kids
    • Travel For Work
    • Staycations
  • Workshops
  • Contact Us
No Result
View All Result
No Result
View All Result
Home Fun With Kids

Hurtful Words Parents Say To Children

by Meiling Wong
in Fun With Kids
3
0
SHARES
539
VIEWS
Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
Angry words parent and child
Image from Alloutofsouts blogpost

“You should not be born. I should never have given birth to you kids.”

These cutting words rudely interrupted my serene afternoon. An Asian mother was berating her children (a boy and a girl) as they walked into the social club I belong to. Even though I do not know this mother or her children, my heart felt the sting and flinched with every word she uttered. A lump began to form in my throat. My heart felt pinched. These words were not directed at me but I felt like crying!

OUCH! What a horrible thing to say to your children!

I did not stare at the mother indignantly. Neither did I confront her.

Instead, I looked away and stared blindly at a distance and pretended that I was not eavesdropping. I wanted to give her (and her children) some privacy, because (believe it or not) I understand her outburst. This should not be taken as an agreement, but I have, (I’m ashamed to say) had some similar situations when I’m chewing out my kids and let’s just say, I uttered words that I’m not proud of.

Of course we yell at our kids. Any parent who profess that they don’t are either saints or liars.

But there are just some words that a parent should NOT say to their kids. These are the words that you regret the minute they leave your mouth. Words that you can never retrieve. Words that you wish your children did not hear you say. Words that you wish they could forgive and forget. Words that made you angrier, not at them but at yourself for even saying them. Words that make you want to crawl into a deep, dark hole and never come out to see the light of day again.  Words like those uttered by this mother.

Moving Past The Angry Words

I’m sure (at least I hope) this mother will regret her words once her anger has dissipated.

What I’ve learnt is that almost every mother has said some hurtful words to their children at some point in their parenting journey, whether intentionally or not. We are humans after all. The blessing is we can learn from this.

1. Be aware of your anger threshold and find a way to walk away before you see RED. – Like any natural disaster, there are signs that forewarn the calamity. Be familiar with the signals your body send out when you can feel your agitation rising. For example, your stomach area starts to feel warm, your temple veins start pounding, or you experience shortness of breath.

2. Know the trigger points – Some things just make you angry. Period. No reason, they just annoy you. These things are your trigger points. Found this great blog post by All Out of Sorts that shares some helpful tips on triggers and managing your angry moments. Click here for the link.

3. Find a support system – As with any compulsion, it helps to have someone to share your anxiety, angst or frustrations with. Sharing with or confessing to another trusted parent helps alleviate the pressure of guilt and strengthens your resolve to not make the same mistake twice. There is also the accountability to another adult that your ‘yelling’ does not escalate into ‘verbal abuse’. Just make sure your confidant is someone who will be helpful and not judgemental.

4. Apologize to your child/ren – If you have uttered any words that you regret, YOU OWE YOUR CHILDREN AN APOLOGY. Just as when they disrespected you and you make them apologise, it is vital that you apologize and seek their forgiveness. That’s right, eat some humble pie and let them know that you’re sorry for saying those words. And hopefully their easy forgiveness, so readily given will serve as a restraining order against such an offence occurring again. 

I found this prayer by M.S. Lowndes©  which I found helpful to keep in mind the next time you feel a verbal lashing threatening to take over in the future.

Lord, help me never say
Words that hurt another
Help me always speak with words
That will uplift and encourage.

Share this:

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)
  • Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)

You May Also Like:

Tags: Anger ManagementChildrenEmotional WellbeingHurtful Words & BehaviourLife in SingaporeMisbehaviourMothersParentstressTantrums
ShareTweetShare
Previous Post

Featured In Social Media Week

Next Post

Featured In The Sunday Times Connect – Share With Care

Related Posts

Fun With Kids

Fun Activities For Kids That Are Free in Singapore

by Meiling Wong
16/07/2020
Career women working mothers
Career

10 Strategies For Busy Working Mothers

by Meiling Wong
16/07/2020
5 Basic Study Skills for Primary 1 to 3 Students
Career

Reading Motivation for Kids: A Critical Life-skill to Cultivate

by Meiling Wong
26/03/2020
Christmas Shopping at Fairs and Bazaars
Engaging Parents

Christmas Shopping at Fairs and Bazaars

by Meiling Wong
16/07/2020
Island-wide National Day Celebrations in Singapore
Celebrations & Occasions

Island-wide National Day Celebrations in Singapore

by Meiling Wong
23/11/2019
What Kind Of Mother Are You?
Celebrations & Occasions

What Kind Of Mother Are You?

by Meiling Wong
06/08/2017
Next Post
Featured In The Sunday Times Connect – Share With Care

Featured In The Sunday Times Connect - Share With Care

Comments 3

  1. Pingback: What About Our Children? | ASWIFTT RADIO's Website
  2. Zee says:
    8 years ago

    Thank you for sharing. We should never say anything hurtful to anybody, but I think the impact can be greater when the words are directed at a child from someone the child loves and respects so much. My mum has said some really hurtful words to me in a fit of anger, and unfortunately they will never be forgotten. This is why I remind myself I should never do the same to my own child(ren).

    Reply
  3. Pingback: It is ok to say no | creativetidalwave

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

CONNECT WITH US

SEARCH

No Result
View All Result

BEST PARENTING BLOG

US on FACEBOOK

SuperWebTricks Loading...

Be The First To Know

Subscribe to our mailing list to receive monthly updates and exclusive invites!

POPULAR STORIES

  • 11 Introduction Ideas to Begin Your English Compositions

    11 Introduction Ideas to Begin Your English Compositions

    11 shares
    Share 11 Tweet 0
  • Common DSA Questions Asked In Interviews

    13 shares
    Share 13 Tweet 0
  • 30+ Movies About Parent-Child Relationships To Watch With Kids

    0 shares
    Share 0 Tweet 0
  • PSLE: How To Score A-star in Composition Writing

    1 shares
    Share 0 Tweet 0
  • How Can Parents Help To Prepare For PSLE Oral (English)

    6 shares
    Share 6 Tweet 0
Currently Playing

My little Chef & the Song Cho Bread Maker

My little Chef & the Song Cho Bread Maker

00:05:02

DIY: How to make Fluffy Slime at home!

00:04:03

LEGO Boost Review and Unboxing!

00:05:03
  • Editors & Contributors
  • Media Agencies
  • Seminars & Events
  • Corporate & Academic Workshops
  • Testimonials

Copyrights © 2012 - 2020 All rights reserved by Universal Scribbles.

No Result
View All Result
  • HOME
    • About Us
    • Collaborate
    • Featured
  • Moms & Dads
    • Parenting
    • Relationships
    • Family Time
    • Work
      • Career
      • Business
      • Money
  • Fun With
    • Little Kids
    • Big Kids
    • Teenagers
  • Education
    • Local Schools
    • Tuition & Enrichment
    • Students
  • Lifestyle
    • Health & Beauty
    • Food
  • Travel
    • Travel With Kids
    • Travel For Work
    • Staycations
  • Workshops
  • Contact Us

Copyrights © 2012 - 2020 All rights reserved by Universal Scribbles.

Welcome Back!

Login to your account below

Forgotten Password?

Create New Account!

Fill the forms bellow to register

All fields are required. Log In

Retrieve your password

Please enter your username or email address to reset your password.

Log In
loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.